you’re afraid of what?!

I have had to come face to face with some of my many fears in the past year so I thought I would take stock of what I am afraid of and how to overcome those fears.  here is a list not in any particular order:

  1. falling.
  2. riding a bike
  3. high places
  4. boat rides.
  5. being abandoned 
  6. high speeds

getting over those fears involves facing them.  or practicing them.    OK I can see that for some of these.  and some of my fears stem from the falling fear. 

This past summer I did a couple of things that involved some of these fears. 

I actually road on the water slides at the water park we go to every year.  and I actually went down one of the speed slides! luckily it was an overcast day when the park was not all that busy.  so I could take all the time I needed to muster up the courage to go down the slide.  it involved 3 of my fears.  hights, falling, and speed.  it was a great accomplishment for me. but I was extremely frightened.  not sure I will do it again. although my children want me to.

on that same day we also went to an amusement park.  I am not a big fan of amusement parks.  don’t  like to ride rollercoasters.  the ferris wheel scares me to death.  I do like the marry-go-round.     any way we came across a ride that was called the aero 360.  you guessed it, it swings back and forth till it goes all the way around.  my husband, my daughter and her husband went on it.  it looked like they were enjoying the ride… it looked smooth… it looks like fun.   so when they got off and my husband said “you want to go?” I said “sure”     WHAT WAS I THINKING????    as soon as the thing started to move I said “this was a bad idea”     My husband was across from me so I had my feet stretched out touching his legs the whole time.  my eyes were mostly closed I think but not all the time cause that didn’t really help.  My hands were gripping the brace that holds you not quite as firmly as I would have liked.  My knuckles were truly white.  I was breathing in such a way that the poor woman next to me was worried that I was going to die.  As I disembarked from the ride I was shaking, and feeling inadequate as a human being since almost every one else enjoyed the thrill of the ride. 

frankly I am tired of being afraid.    I understand that many people are frightened of rides like the ones I did that day.  and these are not unreasonable fears, but what about my fear of riding a bike?  I think I would be OK riding on a level surface.  I have done that before, many, many years ago.  but the thought of  riding down hill terrifies me.  it truly does. 

So that is the first fear I am going to face. Riding a bike.  Silly.   

and that brings me to the next thing I am afraid of, Failing…

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About aloneagain3

I am a wife and mother of 5 grown children... and 3 grandchildren.. I have been married for 29 years... I thought I did ok at life... turns out i sucked at it... but I am getting better!! View all posts by aloneagain3

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