I made a to do list for the week. It contained seven items. Out of the seven, three are crossed off. Of the three only one is completely finished, one is done but not well, the third I was unable to complete because of an error on the web site, so I need to check back but haven’t done that yet.
This begs the question, do to do lists really work for me? In my own defense, I did accomplish other things that were not on the list. So maybe the problem is that my list did not include all that needed to be done. I am not sure what priority level of the items on my list should have been. Some I did not get done will absolutely need to be done asap. which will make my new list for next week even larger.
So what is the point of talking about this? This list is causing me stress. However I have been unable to focus myself to get much of anything done with out a list. This is an indication to me that my depression is deepening. I have had days this week when I am working on house work or other things only to stop, lay down and stare myself to sleep. My doctor has increased my medication, but my fear is that in the weeks it takes for that to kick in, am I going to get so far behind on my to do list that I will feel like a total failure. I am already feeling like I can’t handle all the responsibilities I have.
Yes I feel as if I am drowning. again.
Maybe it would serve me better to do a “ta done” list instead of a to do list. Well maybe not instead but in addition to. but that is just another item on my to do list.