So here I am at the start of a new year. Yet everything feels so old. same old feelings, same old vibes, same old self.
I wanted to be different this year. I wanted to be hopeful. Instead I am wondering where this year is going to lead me. I feel negative. unwanted. stupid. to blame for all that is wrong in the lives of those around me.
I am still here, alone. Not with my husband. No good friends to count on. just me. and I am not good enough even for myself. and it is so abundantly clear that I am not good enough for anyone else either.
I know I am not supposed to give into these negative feelings and self talk, but when actions and words of others reinforce them how can I not?