recently I posted ( at least I think I did) something about always being the one to reach out etc.
Well tonight is a point in case to support that fact of my life. seems as though every one I have tried to communicate with tonight has not been available or ignored me.
this really does not help boost an already bruised self-esteem.
it makes me wonder what is so unattractive about conversing with me that people don’t seem to want to do it. usually I don’t spend a great deal of time talking about myself I (at least I think I don’t)
I can’t take feeling this way any more. and yet I can’t, not reach out to people. I can’t stand being out of contact, not having close relationships. How in the world do I get over this? How do I change who I really am so I don’t have to feel so lonely any more?