selfishness anger and guilt.

It seems to me that when one is in the process of recovering from depression, and getting over deep hurts that may not be over with, one is selfish.

selfishness leads to anger, anger leads to guilt.  at least for me it does.

I am angry because I will be the primary care giver for my daughter as she recovers from her gunshot wound.   She is not an easy patient.  And because she had a large wound in her leg I will be the primary caregiver for her son.

I am still working, I start school on the 18 of december.  oh and there is Christmas in there.  then there is my  therapy that I need to keep me from loosing it all together, and our couples therapy, which we need so we can get our marriage back.

I have been told I need to change my “self talk”   so I have been telling myself  that:

  1. I am strong
  2. I am assertive
  3. I demand respect
  4. I am a remarkable woman.

I have my doubts as to whether any strong, assertive, respected, remarkable woman could handle all of this.

I don’t really want to be angry.  It all makes me feel guilty because the anger makes me not want to do anything for anyone. But my daughter was SHOT.  she needs to be cared for.  and I am angry about it.  that makes me feel guilty.

oh well   life goes on and so do I.

 

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About aloneagain3

I am a wife and mother of 5 grown children... and 3 grandchildren.. I have been married for 29 years... I thought I did ok at life... turns out i sucked at it... but I am getting better!! View all posts by aloneagain3

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