worst pain ever.

I am sure there are those who feel that the worst pain one could ever feel is the death of a parent.

True that is very painful and it changes your life in tremendous ways.  I remember feeling lost, alone and had a sense that I had to be all grown up now.  I was in my early 30’s when my mother and farther died.

The pain I feel now as a result of my husband’s infidelity is by far greater, longer lasting, and more difficult to understand.

It is worsened by the fact that the husband doesn’t validate my pain.

I want it all to go away.  I don’t want to have thoughts about the two of them together.  about their conversations.

I would love nothing more than to right now at this moment to go and talk with the husband about how I am feeling, and to have him just be understanding, and remorseful.

I feel however that he would consider it to be another “beating” as he calls them, and that he would soon revert to telling me how badly he was feeling and how that lead him to the affair in the first place.

I am no sure we are going to make it through.

So happy new year to all of you who have hope for a better future.  As for me it seems to be just another day in this time of pain.

The worst pain I have ever felt in my entire life.

 

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About aloneagain3

I am a wife and mother of 5 grown children... and 3 grandchildren.. I have been married for 29 years... I thought I did ok at life... turns out i sucked at it... but I am getting better!! View all posts by aloneagain3

2 responses to “worst pain ever.

  • anywoman1234

    If you are not already in joint counseling, i highly suggest it. like others have said while reading over your posts, you need to set the tone here. he needs to support you, not her. i wish you the best.

    • aloneagain3

      we were in joint counseling… but the counselor stopped our sessions because the husband won’t stop talking to the ow. I am not happy about it and neither is my husband but he does admit that we are no longer in counseling because of him. I hope it won’t be long before we can resume as the husband is in individual therapy as well.
      thanks for reading and thanks for the input. I do appriciate it.
      aa3

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