Tag Archives: ramblings

rambling day.

March 31

Had somewhat of a long day today. 

Began with  my new wake up call, “Grammy”    My grandson now comes to get me instead of his mother.  I got upset with her today because of her frustration with his terrible twos.  she said some awful things about being a mother.   after that chaos calmed a bit, the afternoon wasn’t too bad.  then I went to work.  worked for 5 hours. came home to work on my daughter’s birthday cake.  put in about three hours of work on that. 

Tomorrow will be a long day as well.  working 9-5 then home to finish the cake.  The best part is that my husband will be home.  I am so looking forward to that.  I am sure he really isn’t as he had a bad day at work today.  not that he doesn’t want to come home, he just won’t be to thrilled about the 3 hour drive. 

I really want to ask him about his contact with “her” but know that this is not a good time. I wish I didn’t have to ask.  I would like him to tell me himself as if it really wasn’t a big deal.  or that I didn’t have to ask because he wasn’t talking to her at all.  

I just need to be there with him for so many reasons.  it would be a help to him as well.  maybe soon he will realize that.  

that is all the ramblings I have for now.

anxious chaotic rambling.

March 17    Well it was a  minute ago… so we are gonna say it still is for purposes of this post. 

For some reason this evening I have been anxious.  I have no reason to be, yet I still feel anxious.   I also found myself very angry at one point.   I am not longer angry, but I am still anxious. 

I guess I will have days like this. 

I wonder does this anxious, nervous energy burn calories?  that would be great. I need to lose about 20 to 25 lbs. 

I had trouble sleeping last night, I am chalking that up to the 2 cans of dr pepper I had that evening.  I was tired tonight after I came home from work but no longer feel tired.  I hope I can sleep.  I did drink more soda tonight.    but I don’t think it will be the problem… I think it is my anxiety. 

I just don’t feel right.  What the heck.  I was feeling much more normal last week and earlier this week.   now I feel this sence of chaos in my mind and body.   

I hope the vacation will help. 

I am rambling.  Sorry.    I am no longer comfortable with my chaos.

responders vs non-responders.

in the world of electronic communication there are two kind of people.  Responders  and non-responders. 

I am a responder.  if you send me a text or an email I will respond unless it is clear that no response is warranted.    it is important for me to let you, the sender know that I received your communication. 

My husband is a non-responder.  This can be very frustrating. did the text  send? did what I have to say mean nothing to you, or make you mad?  Are you ok?

Having a non-responder husband adds to my recent insecurities.  I over analyze the meaning behind getting no response.  In reality there is no reason for the non-response, it is just his way.  I have addressed this matter with my husband.  and I think he has tried, but is still mostly a non-responder.    I don’t mind the no response to an informational text such as “I am at work now”    but when I send a text telling him that I love him or miss him or can’t wait to see him some kind of acknowledgement of the sentiment would be nice.    When I get no response I picture rolled eyes and a oh brother attitude.  when I get a response I feel validated and appreciated.    A response means a great deal to me.

If you read this I am curious to know which category you fall under, and if you are in a relationship with the opposite type.   

Please Respond!!!